This fee is non-refundable.  Time to radiate the beef.

No, you just hit the steer on the head with a sledge,

It's not like shooting a person in the brain.

Okay, everybody, think scientifically, brains under-utilized,

And welcome to Consensus Reality--our motto is:  You Get Fucked Over.

Maybe Geek-chic, but there is no such thing as University Heights.

How compromised are you prepared to get?  Our fearless leader begins:


I'm from the business end and today's topic is worker

productivity and drugs.  Coffee is good, amphetamines

are good, Columbian workers work sixteen-hour days

with no food on coca leaves.  Doctors call ephedrine an

antihistamine, but it's really speed.  Any questions?



As you can see, our headless honcho is fully assholistic.

Keeps his eyes on the bull, pays his dues to the kleptocracy.

When he's finished with you, you won't feel like you've been dicked.

You've been Richarded (talk about sustainable growth).

The three o'clock lecture is "Progress:  an Unbroken Line

From the Wheel to the Catalytic Converter and Beyond."

Modern Primitives may hang from meathooks in your kitchen,

But you'll be doing this job till they wheel you into the oven.

Think of your skill-set, skin the hide that speeds you peel it off one easy

Demotion.  With enforceable legislation, solid infrastructure, and certification,

We have lift off:  convene your own conference.  Some stake in the sizzle.

By then your life will resemble the mall's tuxedo rental store.

Don't worry about your mental health.  There is no such thing.

All employees are henceforth required to speak in palindromes.

And Dad (el beef) kill non-sllik, feeble Dad-DNA.


--David Fox